Previous Feature: Catfish McDaris

Catfish McDaris has been in more magazines, chapbooks, and broadsides than a porcupine has quills. He’s from Albuquerque and Milwaukee. At the moment, he’s selling wigs in a dangerous neighborhood.

The Three-Legged Chicken

His pockets were running on empty,
the rich gay dude said, “The only
way you’re getting five grand out of
me is if you stick it up my tailpipe”

Spaniard should have hit the road,
not the dirt one either, the hose
monkey pulled off his pants and
his undies with little yellow ducks

“The money first” he pocketed the
green and lit up a rum soaked
Xalapa Cohiba, he got it red hot
and he buried the cigar, except

The burning tip, “Try not to inhale”
it got loud, like Tarzan in the jungle,
Spaniard pulled out the cigar and
shoved in three frozen chicken legs.

Rats, Bums, French Machine Guns, and Dogs

Spaniard saw a rat in Chicago
looking at him as he went
down to catch the El train

There was a dead bum in the
Metro in Paris, ten smoking
gendarmes with machine guns

Surrounded him passing wine
bottles and pissing on the wall,
another bum lived in a card

Board box outside with his dog,
they both shit on the sidewalk
in front of everyone, the dog

Ate well and the bum had a cell
phone he used when he wasn’t
begging, the bum took his dog

Into buy food, he would put the
dog in a shopping basket and they
acted like Napoleon and Lauro.

Blue Desperado

Apacho Comancho could hear a fly
fart in a hurricane, when he strutted
down the avenue all the vaginas
palpitated pulsated and pounded

Apacho was the motherfucking cat’s
meow, Mr. Love ‘em and Leave ‘em
he left all the ladies a hot mess under
duress, dancing into the garden of

Earthly delight with lightning bugs
tangoing in the air and swimming in
the dark oceans of the night, panthers
in a line wrapped around his legs

Comancho bought a white stallion, so
white it was blue, he rode west and
crossed rivers of blood, his heart was
poisoned, his horse and he became one.

All Hail! Catfish McDaris’ full-length collection, Sleeping With the Fish (2016), is available via Pski’s Porch. To learn more, please click on the cover image below . . .