Previous Feature: Colin James

Colin James has two poetry chapbooks available: Dreams Of The Really Annoying (Writer’s Knight Press, 2014), and A Thoroughness Not Deprived Of Absurdity (Pski’s Porch Publishing, 2015). He has also become a student again.

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Expanding the Parameters of Romanticism

A certain celebrity’s vagina is rumored
to smell like cataleptic mushrooms
from the northern regions of France,
slightly seasoned with garlic then
cooked in extra virgin olive oil.
Her rival’s sweet orifice has been likened
to a Glade room air freshener.
The unobtrusively handy, wall-mounted spray
available in nine colors including
Mouth Watering Red, Tunnel Black
and Particularly Pink. Now, how to
make myself appear interesting without
exposing surgically enhanced nostrils,
to a capably gentile mind taking
extra classes in secular nebulism. Or until
these carpeted hotel walls transcend the grunts
of pulsating catastrophic humping, my darlings.

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The Tyrant of Happiness

Ethereal gadgets influence our decor
specifically gauche dabbling.
Choosing these knee-high tables
has us sitting cross-legged on the floor.
For me to roll in your direction
requires a yogi’s dexterity I don’t possess,
so rapture still defies me willingly.
The shapes that pass our nervous windows
are asking too much when they try
to project ceremonial clairvoyance.
Directions to the nearest institution
are clearly stated on four of the walls.
Simply take a continuous series
of right-hand turns to arrive.
If possible avoid the second,
as a surprising number of infidels have
metaphorically relieved themselves there.

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All Hail!  In celebration of National Poetry Month, editor Gerald So is currently conducting his annual 30 Days of The Five-Two extravaganza. It includes daily postings that review previous publications at The Five-Two, along with those at other online journals including Midnight Lane Boutique, Misfit Magazine, Mystery Playground, Red Fez, Yellow Mama, and more. To take part, simply click on the image to your right. And, do enjoy!

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